What A Way To Cab The Night Off

After not clubbing for a while, I finally went out again last night :) and yes it was pretty fun! The night actually capped off with the club playing gangnam style… would you believe it? A club down under playing gangnam, and the boys were loving it, Asians and Caucasians alike.

O-oo-O -Ooppa Gangnam Style!

Seeing that it was getting late, and with the losing of an hour because the clock turns ahead for Daylight-Saving, I decided to finally end my night of 3-Bs… Boys, Booze and Body shaking (that’s what everyone was doing… not actually dancing, lol) to hitch a cab home. And boy oh boy, I had one of the most interesting conversations with the cabbie driver. 

I gotta get me one of these!

I started off politely telling him where I wanted to go and continued to ask him how his night was. And he said it was not as busy as he’d like, but he knew he’d always get customers if he waited outside the gay bar. And so I replied saying yea, that is true, we like to party :)

“Yea gay guys like to party, and they have all the money to spend partying… No need worry about wife and kids, so very good. I telling my wife, next life no more born as straight!”

And I thought, wow… okay cool… Then he went on…

“but all the party happen when young, when they get old, they know it no good. No wife and No children… that when they know problem”

(pardon the English, but I think he was an Italian migrant and that was the way he spoke)

I thought okay whatever, I don’t really need to continue this conversation. Everyone is entitled to what he or she thinks. BUT, he then repeats the same thing again, about how when gay guys grow old they regret, and that some of his taxi customers tell him that.

So being the good gay that I was, I thought it was time to defend the community a bit, and I said

“Well that’s why gay people lobby for same-sex marriage, so that we can grow old with the people we love, but straight people don’t like that do they? They want to stop gay people from getting married with the people they love”

I was thinking to myself, way to go Lucas, get the stupid cabbie!

The conversation could have ended there, but no… it went on…

“if they want to get marriage, maybe it okay, but when they want to hav children then it is a problem because children need mommy and daddy”

WTF?

When I heard that, I almost burst a blood vessel, partly because of the promoted hemoglobin flow from the alcohol, but also mostly because of how ignorant this cabbie was. Once again, being the good gay that I am, I could not possibly have let that rest and slept properly that night (or morning). 

“Are you saying that 2 fathers or 2 mothers cannot possibly raise a child properly? That a family must surely have a father and a mother? (he answers with an affirmation) So then the state and the government then has a right to remove children from single moms and dads because it is not a proper family, is that what you are trying to say?” 

Silence… I was thinking, score Lucas! Homos-1, Breeders -0

Then he says

“Yes but before divorce as single parent, they have proper family so that is okay. 2 men and 2 women cannot have child in first place, so not okay.”

I believe had I accepted the offer of the last tequila shot at the bar; I’d have burst my second blood vessel of the night. So then I retorted by saying that, yes but after divorce they are worse than a gay couple, because they only have one parent, so then again it must be the states responsibility to take the child away from the single parent. Silence from him. Then I went on to say that, gay couples do end up adopting as well and so all of that has the potential to solve the orphan problems in a lot of communities. Once again no reply from him…

And then he finally said that “no government can take child away from single parent", and that, "that would be wrong” 

But apart from that he had nothing else to say. Thankfully I arrived at my stop after that. So I politely said to him

“Everyone is entitled to their own views, but if your view is in anyway hypocritical or biased, then please do not try to impose it on others. If single parents are good enough to raise a child, then a gay or lesbian couple would be just as good if not twice as good.”

I further urged him not to only see things from one point of view, and to have a good night. His lack of reply after my soapbox lines either meant that I have managed to enlighten him a bit; or that his cabbie instincts kicked in and reminded him that he should never start an argument with the customers. 

Signing out.

Still Here and Fighting On!

Its been ages since I last posted something here, so I thought its high time I posted something to remind everyone that Lucas is still lurking around.

A quick update on what's going on in my universe at the moment... My first job out of uni is going great and the best part about the new job are my supportive colleagues. Absolutely amazing! Wont be dwelling too much into my work here, as the blog is more about my personal thoughts and life, rather than my professional one.

Next big thing going on in my life is that I’m finally fully trained in combat! I actually started off my combat addiction way back in 2010, yes… sometimes I think its more of an addiction than passion :) Finding that it was both an awesome cardio workout and at the same time still relatively-comparatively masculine, I was hooked!

Thumbs up to Takashi and one of my fellow instructors here down under for inspiring and motivating me to become an instructor! Its taken me actually a very long time to go from participant to  full fledged instructor, but now I’m finally on the timetable! Woohoo! Last week I led my very first class alone :)

Look who's on the board this week!!!

… okay I don’t have a permanent class of my own yet and I’m currently only subbing for other instructors, but all in good time... And also, if any of you were wondering, NO, I do not go to sleep every night hoping that an instructor falls sick so that I can cover them. Honest, I promise!

I am however working hard and asking around for a permanent time slot that both suits my time and is accessible to me by public transport...

Having the opportunity to motivate others through their combat workout is actually a very wonderful feeling and having gone through the whole process of becoming an instructor, I must say that I'm very happy to be where I am now. Its actually a funny feeling leading a class through their workout though. I get hyper excited when I get rostered a class, but five minutes before class, all the excited cocoons in my tummy magically morphs into butterflies (at the fking same time) and all of a sudden I have this butterfly park in my stomach making me extremely nervous. To me, teaching combat is fun, scary, exciting and nerve wrecking all blended into a tall (and trendy) glass of healthy smoothie mix.

Signing out.

Lime Thief

Was invited to a friend's house today for drinks, and the original intention of drinks tonight was to help a friend drown his sorrows of his recent break up.I however rocked up and completely unintentionally stole the lime-light for the wrong reasons. Which brings me to the reason and term... Schadenfreude.



Schadenfreude, was a term I learned from watching Boston Legal, yes sue me, but I love corny comedies like that. Basically what that term means is for one to derive pleasure from another's suffering or demise. It's actually a German term, so when saying the word, the best pronunciation can be achieved holding a genuine German brew during October.
After researching the word to refresh my memory, which basically means Wikipedia-ing, it's explained that it's a German word that doesn't really have an English equivalent. Probably not because the English don't experience schadenfreude, but rather because they are in denial about their short comings.

Apparently people with lower self esteem are more likely to experience schadenfreude. I guess that says something about yourself if you feel happy seeing your friends fail. Although I must say we are all bound to feel some form of schadenfreude sometimes in our lives. Like in a game of chess, chess not chest, if your opponent loses, it simply means you win. In situations like that, wouldn't schadenfreude be justified?

Nonetheless, this is probably a very undesired and unhealthy feeling to develop. In some sense our education system in Boleh-land somewhat encourages this . Because everyone's academic scores are always compared to each other, if I perform badly in a class it is always reason for my friends to celebrate, isn't it... Because it means their academic position in class will be better than mine. Schadenfreude anyone?

I digress, back to my friend's house and the drowning of sorrows. Whether it was a form of schadenfreude or their genuine concern for my situation, they started asking me about my love life, which in this case was undeniably, undoubtedly, unmistakably a non-existent entity. And despite it being a night for the friend that just broke up, I started to steal the lime light and ranted for the longest period of time about the situation I was in.

Oh bad bad Lucas... LoL, I went on and on about my failed dates and guy mismatch situation. And some of the other less glorious parts of my life as it is.I think if it was a case of schadenfreude for my friends, it was then a win win situation for everyone. Because I felt better voicing out my problems, and at the same time if they feel better hearing that there are other sad people out in the world, then it's a win win for everyone. Right?



To the friend that just broke up, I like to repeat the cliche of fishes and seas... And to say that it is better to have found out earlier, than later.

To my friends that gave me an outlet to voice my problems and listened to my ranting, I wanna say thank you, because I think it helped heaps.

Signing out.

A Mic for Christmas

Well, since starting a new job recently, I've been super busy... hence the super duper ultra belated blog update... but today's post will be a rant about one of the dates I've been on recently.

Picture this...

Sample of cute guy

You meet this cute guy on a social networking site... he looks hot and cute, two ridiculously superficial qualities I can't help but like, and sounds like a decent person when exchanging messages. So then you swap numbers with him and arrange to go out for dinner together...

Everything seems perfect, until you finally meet up, and the thing I say most, on what I consider to be the first date, is none other than: "huh?" and "what?".

Mind you that isn't in response to something crazy or outrageous that he said... rather its because I can't hear him half of the time. That is seriously a real turn off!

Boys, speak up! If I wanted to date a chirping sparrow... I would have done that... although I wouldn't know what we would do in the bedroom. I find it an absolute turn off when guys just whisper their answers... how can we have a decent conversation if I can't hear your responses? Am I scaring you that much that you can't find your voice.

Err... Hello! We aren't in a library okay... you don't have to lower your voice and whisper... The only signal I get from a guy that doesn't talk with a normal volume is that he lacks confidence... and some guys may like a timid, quiet, barely audible boyfriend...(14th century men: women are meant to be seen not heard? or was it slaves?) but not me. I think conversation and communication is important, so if we can't have that, then I don't think anything is going to work out.

Hey, this was just a dinner meet up... Imagine if we were doing some other extra curricular activities together,

"More? Do you want more?"

"..."

"huh? what did you say?" (for the kinkier readers, no he isn't gagged -.-)

“…”

“huh? I cant hear you…”

Well there goes the mood, turn off man...

mind you I was asking him if he wanted to do more reps...

Word of advice boys, speak up, confidence attracts!

Signing out.

Too nice! You Lose!

Literally Bromantic!

Okay this is really starting to bug me... Why does the bad guy always win?

Spoiler alert for This Means War... If you still wanna watch the movie... Then don't read on... I kid you not.

Anyway, I went out and watched the movie last week with a friend... A girl... That is if any of you were wondering. Anyway, we watched This Means War! When I first saw the trailer ages ago, I found both the actors very attractive... And couldn't wait to watch it.

In terms of realism... The show completely lacks any realistic elements. But in terms of comedy... Hold on to your seats folks, coz you're gonna be laughing your heads off. Oh... And just a side note, the bromance within the movie is very cute too :) wish I had that with my best friend...

Anyway, not to spoil too much Of the movie... The guy that cheats, lies, and plays dirty eventually wins the heart of the legally blonde actress... She is awesome by the way!

What I dont get is how is it possible that the nice guy always finishes last... I seriously find that very very disturbing :( I like to think that I'm more of the nice guy... and most certainly hate to think (or to know) that I always finish last.

What is it about having a bad streak that is attractive?

Cute, Lean and has a Brittish accent... What's not to like? Oh and he is nice too

After watching that movie, I felt sooo sorry for the nice guy that lost out... (if I could I would have given him a nice big cuddle *devious smile*) but yea... I felt sorry for him.

I understand we all need a little bit of adventure and danger in our lives... all in the name of keeping life interesting... But isn't picking the bad guy the wrong choice? I'm sure there comes a time in life where you just want to settle down and cut back on the adventure... will mister-I'll-steal-your-heart-by-being-a-bad-guy be the right guy for you?

All I'm saying is that I think the nice guy should be given a chance to finish first... don't you think?

Signing out.

Exceeding Expectations!

I am officially back in the house. This time hopefully for real!

I realise that blogging was always a way for me to just let go of myself when I was a student... Most of my blog posts were by-products of just me sipping a flat white (the coffee some of us drink here down under), at my favourite cafe, chillingly typing away at my keyboard and trying to get down something legible.



So for my return post, I’d like to talk a little about expectations...

Caught up with a few good friends for coffee over the weekend, and the conversation steered to ‘expectations’… and somehow I think what I got from that conversation was that I just simply expected too much. Especially in terms of getting a response...

me... waiting for a response...

What I said to my friends was that I thought people in the gay world simply weren’t courteous enough. Most of them don’t ever reply to my greeting messages online or Grindr. Boys, I get that I may look like a troll to you… but the least you can do is just give me a short reply saying you are not interested… At the very least I know that you’ve seen my message. Is it really that difficult?

Well apparently its okay that people don’t message me back… and that I should just move on and not let it bother me. Frankly I don’t know why, but it just bothers me that a simple reply cannot be written. SERIOUSLY? How long is it going to take you to type “sorry not interested, have a nice day” SERIOUSLY!!??!!??!!??

Well I guess after having that conversation… I’ll have to start telling myself that it is normal that people don’t respond. It could be because they aren’t interested and its their way of saying NO, it could be because they have no manners, or it could just be because they can’t be fucked… (well in a physical sense... if you can't meet them, you can't fuck them, rite?) Either way, I really have to start to expect less… and not let it bother me too much anymore…

What if I looked like that?

Sometimes I can’t help but think that if I looked like Channing Tatum, I wouldn’t have this problem… or maybe I would… who knows… maybe I was right all along… people just aren’t courteous enough! And I've been expecting too much all along!

Signing out.

Back in Action, Sorta...

Hey guys, I've been uber busy lately trying to get my life back on track while constantly getting off track... Woah that statement sounded rather oxymoronic... Anyways, still no jobs yet, after graduating for more than half a year... So if anyone has a position for me, I'm more than happy to listen to offers! I'm very versatile!

On another note, took a leaf out of Takashi's book and went ahead and did a Lesmills Module, so now I'm a certified instructor-in-training. When I get back I'll have to go and beg Takashi to let me shadow his classes!!! Thanks in advance yea.

Well, apart from that nothings been going on... Read about the "Clean" rallies going on in Malaysia and all over the world, and shamefully I missed the one here in Melbourne. I'm such a bad Malaysian... I know. Have thought that I've ran out of things to say on this blog and want to make it slightly more political so that I can say more... Not too sure on that yet.

he looks like he supports the Clean rallies too

Just wanted to drop in to say I'm still alive, still single and still jobless!

Signing out.

First Class Havoc

Havoc in First Class

So I recently watched X-men: First Class. Though the show wasn't really a first class show, it was decently made, and I'd definitely recommend everyone to check it out.

Personally I felt that there was an undeniable attempt to portray an underlying love between Magneto and ProfX, beyond that of bromance. And it was kinda funny to watch it... because to a gay dude, those two are surely in love with each other...

On a side note, I love the whole "mutants need acceptance" theme... It sort of mirrors us gays in trying to gain the acceptance of society. Although ours is not a genome defect like mutants, disclaimer in case I get letters by some GLBT activists, we are still pretty much the same in that we are different from the general community and we're struggling to gain acceptance and acknowledgement.

Cut ain't he? I'm soo getting that hoodie vest now!

Ohh... and goodness gracious me is Lucas Till cute in this movie! Lucas (not me, but the actor) plays Alex Summers, a.k.a Havoc. He would be the younger brother of Cyclops in the mainstream X-men, and somehow appears in this movie before Cyclops. As someone who likes X-men, I find it weird that they should introduce Havoc before Cyclops in First Class... but I'm certainly not complaining about the eye candy... He is cute! Oh and for those of you who thinks he is familiar, he plays the dude in the "You Belong With Me" video for Taylor Swift :)

Lucas in the MTV

Anyway guys, go watch the movie!

Signing out.

Are You Going Bananes?

So if you’re gay and reading this… the first think you should see in that picture is not the cute guy, but the Hermes Birkin Bag. The bag made obviously by Hermes is one of the world’s most sort after hand carries for women, and a lot of gays… Apparently they cost up to a hundred thousand American dollars, with the cheapest one being at least a grand.

They come in different colours, here's a light blue one

Quick background info… the bag is always hand crafted and was first made after the celebrity Jane Birkin, hence the name. Well, I have never seen one in real life… and don’t really think it matters that much to me; but to a lot of people out there, it is a very coveted status symbol. It is said that even if you have money you may not get a Birkin, because the waiting list for it is apparently a couple of years.


So anyway, this post isn’t just about the Birkin but more about the Banane Bag. Oh man… Asian entrepreneurs are genius, we don’t waste time inventing. Rather time is spent on innovating and mass producing functional products that are already working in the market. Hence I present to you the Banane Bag.

Check it out, even the advertising seems like a xerox

It is pretty much the image of something that resembles the Birkin Bag on a canvas bag. Hahaha… Its hilarious… And it sells for less than 1 percent of the Birkin. The inventors of the Banane claims that it isn’t a Birkin rip off because it is a whole new product of its own, and it’s also supposedly environmentally friendly because it’s made of canvas and not leather.

Bananes comes in all colours as well, and here is a similar light blue one

Expect to see more of this bag flooded in the market, I reckon this may finally mark the end of the LongChamp bag… They were seriously everywhere…

Not sure why, but this was everywhere at one time

Well even Marc Jacobs carries a Birkin and not a Marc Jacobs bag… LoL, I do wonder if he’ll be caught carrying a Banane Bag?

MJ with his Birkin

Signing out

Virtual Games

I don’t have an iPhone, unlike some of the more financially lucky guys… but on my 23rd birthday my friends all chipped in and bought me an iPod touch, so… I do have the luxury to some of the apps produced for the mobile device.

The first game I was hooked on was 'Angry birds'… I was hooked on it not because I really liked it… but more because I was more kiasu and didn’t wanna lose ma' eggs to those stupid swine… Finally finished it a few months back… :D

The other puzzle like game that got my attention was 'Cut the rope'… Now this I felt was much more interactive than angry birds… as it really requires good timing and some co-ordination.

Cut the ropes to navigate the candy into the cute lil monster's belly

Just the other day, as I was browsing through new apps to download… it came to my attention that EA games are having a sale on their games. So I downloaded the SIMS3 at a heavily discounted price… I’m having some real fun with it… because apparently you can have gay marriages in the game :)

My character Tyler

My character (Tyler) is currently married to this culinary chef called Luke… how ironic right... And they do seem happily married… The only problem is, I don’t know how to get him to move in with me, and don’t know how to adopt kids…

The love of Tyler's life Luke

So I guess the game creators really need to think about giving gay couples in the game the option to adopt. All in all, the gay factor in the game makes it fun… definitely worth trying since its still currently heavily discounted. Haha.

Signing out

Do I Know You?

Every time someone I know forgets my name, I die a little. It could be someone I know from the club, from gym or from some party… but when I say hi to them elsewhere and they say, ‘Do I know you?’ I die a little.

Even when I can name them and they acknowledge that that is indeed their name, but when they still can’t identify me, I die a little more.

And when I can name where I have met them and they acknowledge that they were indeed there, but reply, ‘Don’t remember you there though’, I die yet a little more.

Its situations like this that makes one feel insignificant, almost invisible. You go to the trouble to introduce yourself , and even make an effort to remember some stranger’s name, yet this ungrateful ‘acquaintance’ just forgets your very existence by nonchalantly saying, ‘Do I know you?’



Grr...! the next time you don’t intend to remember my name, please for fucks sake don’t fucking ask for it.

And trust me, you won’t see me introducing myself to anyone if they don’t ask me… coz I’ve reached the stage where I really can’t be bothered anymore.

Signing out.

Camp Be A Man (not from Mulan)

To the readers of this blog, I have been offered the chance of a lifetime to change! And so can you!

Our very own education department from Terengganu has offered a course to cure effeminate guys. Sixty-six lucky boys have already been hand-picked for the first intake. I hope they are cute, otherwise the course co-ordinators won’t be having much fun… I’m genuinely surprised they only picked sixty-six, and not a more auspicious number like sixty-nine.

Here’s the article…
KUALA TERENGGANU: The state Education Department has sent 66 schoolboys with effeminate tendencies to a camp aimed at helping them behave in a proper manner.

"The four-day camp in Besut, the first-ever to be held here, started yesterday. It is to help address the problem afflicting secondary schoolboys.

"They were listed by their schools who were instructed last year to identify students who displayed feminine qualities," said department director Razali Daud.

He said the remedial effort was prompted by the rising number of effeminate schoolboys in the state.
"The severity of the symptoms vary, but the 66 schoolboys were showing behaviours that is not usually displayed by a normal male of their age."

Razali said the link between effeminate behaviour among male students and transsexuality should be a matter of concern that should not be ignored.

"As educators, we have to do something about it before the young ones misunderstand people and reach the point of no return.

"We are not intervening with the process of nature as we are merely trying to guide these students to a proper path in life."

The students will be attending physical education and religious classes conducted by motivational speakers.

"The students must understand that there are choices in life and we want them to know all the options available to them.

"We understand that some people end up as mak nyah (transvestite) or a homosexual, but we will do our best to limit the number."

Razali said parents and teachers should observe the slightest effeminate tendency in their male children from an early age.

"If left unchecked, it could become a problem later in life for them, their families and society."




I remember watching Latter days where they try to cure homosexuality with aversion therapy… OMG it was damn damn damn hot! The scene, and the dude of course… not the therapy.


Anyway, shame on you people, picking on vulnerable little confused boys… how small can you be to be picking on them. Maybe after they check out your small junks, they may be cured of all homosexuality… thinking all cocks are that minute. Be a MAN and accept that homosexuality is here, and just deal with it! Don’t take it out on the young ones.

Anyway, it’s a four day course… one day for each ‘base’. Wahaha… this post isn’t a joke by the way… this is really happening out there… check out the link your self.

Signing out.

HomoParents

All over the world, same-sex couples are feeling the crunch because they are restricted from having children of their own. Whether its religious groups or a political candidate trying to garner support, there is always a shit load of people out there that love spending their free time denying same-sex couples the rights to parenthood. Some even claim that gays and lesbians can’t be good parents.



Well good parenting doesn’t remotely depend on the sexual orientation of the parents, but rather depends on how they are as a person. Same-sex parents can be as good or as bad as any hetero parents, and that is a fact…


When I was back in Malaysia, I was having dinner in one of the ice-cream parlours, and to my disgust I saw a young family with a boy no older than four summers old dining as well. I wasn’t disgusted because they were breeders with a child while homos are denied that basic right… rather the fact that the child had a hand-held console all throughout the dining process irked me.


These parents were obviously not at all fit, because they clearly gave the little kid a Nintendo to play so that they can have a peaceful quiet meal. This is BAD PARENTING 101, exposing a child that young to video games is only paving the way for lifelong social ineptness and bad eyesight.


Another thing I personally saw that took my breath away for all the wrong reasons was this:



Can you believe the nerve of that parent, pushing the toddler around in a stroller with a DVD player? Seriously even if the kid doesn’t grow up with a television addiction, he is bound to be at the very least harmed by the radiation of that mobile player.


The bottom line is that parents are good or bad for a variety of reasons, their own upbringing, stress level at work or for the simple reason of being plain ignorant. The once reason I’m sure cannot be directly linked to bad parenting is being gay.


Signing out.

Back For Now

So I’m still here, well and good. Having recently graduated I’ve been a little lost lately, so I guess that’s why I went missing in action here on my blog. But I’m back now, haven’t really re-found myself, but back nonetheless.

I realise now how hard it is to find a job… it is fucking hard. And now I have to deal with both employment rejection and dating rejection. Live really sucks bad sometimes…

On a lighter note, I’m now casually working as a tutor :) I’m tutoring high school kids, and that’s kind of fun. Its really rewarding when you see them learn new things you teach them.



Been thinking of doing a bunch of other stuff… In a mental debate of whether I should try and be a coffee barista or try and do an instructor course, like what Takashi did. The coffee barista course is cheaper and probably pays better; but the instructor course is fun… So yea… tough choices.



Anyway, I’m really back now, so expect a lot more weird posts very soon :)

Signing out.
(once again, after a very long time)

Shower Show-er

A few of my friends have always warned me against showering in a particular fitnessfirst branch because it was sleazy... I never understood why... Until now.

I had a dinner appointment at 8 so instead of going home to shower after my usual Wednesday evening gym session, I decided to shower at the gym... It made sense, since the gym was in the city and the meeting would also be in the city.

When I first entered the showers, there was only one guy showering in one of the stalls, so I was free to pick a stall with no occupant on either side. It was then that I realised the shower stalls were indeed more opaque than the other gyms. From my stall, I can actually see a faintly clear silhouette of the guy showering in the opposite stall.

At first that was alright, so I continued with my shower... Once I was almost done with my shower... A dude walked into the stall beside me... And, he was no normal dude... Even through the frosty opaque glass separating our two shower stall, I could clearly see that he was buffed.

I was sort of finishing up my shower while trying not to stare at my left too obviously... Coz I figured if I can roughly see him 'this' clearly, then surely he can see me too. Don't wanna scare him if he batted for the 'other' team right?



Then low and behold, he started playing with himself. At first I thought he was just washing down there... Then over time i realised he was either jerking off, or trying to wash off a very stubborn dirt stain on his dick.

The sight of a hot guy showering next to me while playing with himself was just too much. Lil Lucas started to rise to the occasion... And to avoid any ambarrassing situations, I quickly finished my shower... Turned off the water... Dried myself and left the stall with a semi boner. I think if I stayed any longer I may have had to either ended my shower with a cold shower, or jerked myself off too.

I lingered a little longer in the changing area just to see who the guy was, because I recognised his multi coloured towel with foot print designs on it hanging outside his stall. Wow, the guy that walked into the change room with that towel moments later, was hawt! He had a cute face, well defined chest and abs and a very nice butt. *wipes drool*

Did I regret not giving him a hand? Not really... Because firstly I don't really know the proper etiquette of change room cruising. What if he wasn't cruising and was only looking to pleasure himself? And seriously, I'm not that sleazy to cruise in the gym's shower... The guy may have been my cup of tea, but the occasion and setting was not. So no, I don't regret not 'participating'.

Nonetheless, it was an interesting experience... Maybe I will shower there again, just to see what and how other people get it on in the shower... LoL voyeur style :p

Signing out.

The Home Walls

My other big reason for staying abroad is obviously my sexuality. I do want to live closer to my parents as I am very close to them. But sometimes I find it very hard to live under the same roof with them, particularly with their conservative thoughts.

And being gay is obviously that much harder, if and I say IF, I have a boyfriend… I most certainly can’t bring him home.

Say if I could afford my own place close to my parents’ home, then that would be the most ideal situation, so that I can frequently visit them while still maintaining my own privacy when I need it.

I am certainly in no position to buy my own house yet, and there is no reason for my parents to chip in to buy me a place just so that I can move out.

“why you wanna move out when you can stay at home?”
“why waste money to buy a new place when staying at home saves you so much?”

And I’m sure if I mention renting…

“staying at home is so confortable, why waste money and rent just to stay with strangers… FAMILY is always the best”

So all I can really do is to save up and maybe buy my own place in the future. Frankly speaking… the starting wages in Malaysia puts me in no position to even consider buying a house… let alone getting one in the PJ area… in which I understand is very pricey at the moment. Not to mention I must also consider getting the house in a good neighbourhood with a good security guard system… LoL

Hence working overseas with a slightly higher wage, coupled with a strong foreign currency will give me much more options when I decide whether or not to settle back down in Malaysia. And if my parents don't intend to migrate with me, then I'll have to come back (to answer Will's question), as I don't wanna leave my parents alone in their old age.

A lot of people tell me that once I’ve stayed overseas a few years, I won’t want to come back anymore. That is not true, because as a Malaysian I think we are very good at adapting. Even after being abroad for six years, I’m still proud to be a Malaysian, and would gladly move back if not for all these obstacles.

Signing out.

The Penjahat Menace

Initially I don’t feel the need to justify to anyone, safe for my parents, my choice to stay overseas and look for a job. But of late, especially during the Chinese New Year period, I am becoming quite unpleasantly annoyed at some of my relative’s and friends’ comments about not coming back to my home country.

“Overseas graduates like you are contributing to our brain drain…”
“Why not you come back to work here and contribute to your own economy instead of another country’s?”
“Young people like you should be more grateful and remember your roots, you are still a Malaysian and must always remember that.”

Why imagine hearing these comments time and again over the space of only a few weeks back… I’m certain even the most learned monks would at least be slightly roused up. Well I’ve decided to offload some of my steam here… sorry to those of you reading this that disagree… but I think even those that condemn my decision to stay abroad would most definitely jump at a chance to migrate if granted the opportunity.

And to begin with, I am not uprooting myself and moving to another country for good. All I am planning to do now is search for a job overseas to broaden my horizons. I am certainly very open to the option of coming back to Malaysia in the future, if my country wants me, I want him too.

Economic reasons is certainly one of the key factors in me making my decision, but as with all trilogies, I’ll save that for the last. What I’d like to talk about firstly is the general safety of our beloved country.

Having been around for a while in the neighbourhood that I’m in… my house alone has been the victim of theft a total of 4 times… thankfully all four times nobody was home and only earthly possessions were sorely missed. I however fear to even imagine the ghastly consequence of a family member being home when one of those ruthless thieves striked.

Some people may casually dismiss my unfortunate quadrupled theft to simple bad fortune, but let me assure you that this is very much a petrifying and real threat to all of us. In fact the evidence is staring at us right in the face, I have now totally lost count of the number of housing estates and neighbourhoods around the Klang Valley that have been regrettably tasked to set up and hire their own gated security force, just to sleep soundly at night.

The fact that we the citizens are required to hire our own security force is blatant distrust and lack of confidence of the authorities. And that is how we the people of Malaysia have been ‘trained’ to function, when faced with a problem… like bad social security, instead of taking it up with the people in charge… we sit back, take it up the ass, and fork out our own money to hire extra protection.

It isn’t really tackling the problem at the root, but just finding an alternative ‘temporary’ solution. But I suppose to be fair, there are a group of Malaysians that have worked hard to weed out the evil in the system, but to no avail… it seems that even now, they have only succeeded in proving that nothing can be done.

For its citizens to live a productive life and contribute to the general economic wellbeing of the country, they must firstly feel safe in whatever environment they are in. When our general safety and wellbeing is consistently and frequently challenged, its hard then to live a productive life when you always have to look over your back.



Having to hire and establish our own security and gated community is in my opinion a mild form of vigilante-ism. And vigilantes are usually only required when your city is in the slums and the authorities cannot be counted upon, whether due to a lack of hands or a lack of motivation. Corrupted cities like Gotham requires Batman and Metropolis need Superman. Having to establish our own security system is a little like that… it is a form of vigilantes.



My mom always chides me when I come home late after a late night out, and I understand that she fears for my safety when going out late. What with all the internet and sms circulating around about stories of people getting robbed and harassed at night, her fear for my safety is not unfounded. In fact, sometimes even I feel a little scared when staying out too late, but hey… I do like the occasional night out with my friends…

So I start of a series of posts on my reason of staying abroad with safety… some of you may disagree with what I have to say, but… frankly speaking, this is how I feel. And when the time is right, if I am able to convince my parents to do so, I also hope they may choose to live in a safer environment. And of course, I sincerely hope that the safe environement will be back home here in Malaysia. But a lot of work needs to be done before we can achieve that.

Safety first!

Signing out.

Finger In The Door

Hmm, I had a sudden epiphany as my index finger was slammed shut into the door of my car today. Maybe I shouldn’t worry so much about others and start to think of myself more.

What happened was that after an early morning gym session as I was leaving the car park, another car signalled that she wanted my place. So in I hopped to my car and tried to exit the parking spot as quickly as possible so as to not hold up the traffic waiting behind her.

Me being me, I’m usually quite a clumsy person, so in my rush to exit quickly, I kinda slammed the tip of my index finger in the car door. OUCH! Seriously OUCH! Luckily it was only the tip… hence there wasn’t much damage to the finger. Much…

On my drive home, I started to wonder, why the fuck should I care about exiting the parking spot quickly in the first place? She wanted the spot, so she should be patient and wait for it. And screw all the other cars waiting behind her… But then I think of all the times I wait forever behind a car coming out of a parking spot because he/she takes their own sweet time while holding up the traffic and is wasting everyone else’s time. And I seriously don’t want to be one of those mother fuckers that waste others’ time…

Sigh… is it true that I sometimes put the priorities of others ahead of my own priorities? I don’t know the answer to that… but what I do know is that after slamming my finger in today… I’m going to start to be more careful, and not hurt myself in the process just to please others.

I guess getting my finger squashed is also partly my own clumsy fault… but seriously, in my defence, I would have certainly have been more careful and less clumsy if I wasn’t in a hurry.

This reminds me of the bridge in Sara Bareilles’ song ‘King of Anything’. The bridge goes something like:

All my life I’ve tried to make everybody happy
While I just hurt and hide
Waiting for someone to tell me it’s my turn to decide

Its a very nice song, with a catchy tune. You guys and gals should check it out :)

Signing out.

A Poster of Luv

Happy Lunar new year of the Rabbit!



I'm currently back in my home town to celebrate the new year with my family and friends, and over the weekend decided to hit the usual watering hole in the heart of kl city - MP. Went with a few gay friends, and despite it being a Chinese new year weekend, there were still quite a number of guys there.

The one thing that really caught my eye in MP was the valentine day poster! Omg, it was a picture of Goku and Vegeta together... one of the two main characters of the classic manga, Dragon Ball!

When I was a kid, not too long ago I assure you, I use to read Dragon Ball all the time. In fact I have literally the whole collection of the manga in the malay language version. And... I have always fantasized about those two characters getting it on! and Woah!

Here's MP's Valentine Day's flyer!

Haha... This is one of those celeb couples like one of my previous post that I secretly (now not soo much a secret anymore) hoped for. Check out the poster, and if you're a Dragon Ball fan, I'm sure it'll turn you on :p Goku and Vegeta together is almost as awesome as Naruto and Sasuke together. Wahahaha!

Here's Goku with his Saiyan alter ego Kakaroct... kind of a CNY tribute to my eyes :P


Signing out.

Oysters Makes You Grow Horns

I’ve been thinking a lot about aphrodisiacs, and one of the more well-known one is the oyster. So oysters are supposed to make a person feel more hyped up about sex, and want it more. Well that is what an aphrodisiac is right? To in some sense make a person sort of horny.

So this certainly made me think, have I ever felt hornier after consuming oyster products? A lot of Chinese cooking uses oysters as an ingredient. Dishes such as the oyster omelette, a.k.a. “Ohh Zhien”, Dumplings, a.k.a. “Zhang” and also seafood noodles, do add oysters in. Also oyster sauce, is a very common marinade and flavouring in Chinese food is found in heaps of other Chinese dishes. So I can’t help but ask myself if I felt any more, hornier after eating them.



The answer is most certainly: not really. So then I start to think… why is oyster considered an aphrodisiac, is there a particular chemical compound within the sea crustacean that heightens our sex drive? And if there really is such a chemical compound within the oyster, why hasn’t a major pharmaceutical tried to extract it and market it as a substitute to Viagra, a multi-billion dollar industry…

Did some light reading on the net and found that some people reckon oysters increases one’s horny-ness because it supposedly smells like pussy. Yes you heard me right, pussy. I sure hope this piece of information doesn’t deter any of you from oysters, coz even as I type this out now, I still luv oysters… Although I seriously doubt they do smell like an actual cunt.

Anyway, if this whole pussy and oyster thing has any truth to it, does that mean that oysters only work as an aphrodisiac on straight guys and dykes? Does it not work on gay guys whom prefer ass and cock? LoL! A little something to ponder on guys, next time you want to order those expensive air flown oyster entrees to try to get into a guy’s pants, think twice… the oysters may have no effect on him at all.

To all the Chinese out there, Happy Chinese new year to you! And remember to eat more dried oysters, as the Cantonese pronunciation of dried oysters means “good things”, hence it will be at the very least auspicious to consume them oysters, even if they don’t make you any hornier.

Signing out.