Was invited to a friend's house today for drinks, and the original intention of drinks tonight was to help a friend drown his sorrows of his recent break up.I however rocked up and completely unintentionally stole the lime-light for the wrong reasons. Which brings me to the reason and term... Schadenfreude.
Schadenfreude, was a term I learned from watching Boston Legal, yes sue me, but I love corny comedies like that. Basically what that term means is for one to derive pleasure from another's suffering or demise. It's actually a German term, so when saying the word, the best pronunciation can be achieved holding a genuine German brew during October.
After researching the word to refresh my memory, which basically means Wikipedia-ing, it's explained that it's a German word that doesn't really have an English equivalent. Probably not because the English don't experience schadenfreude, but rather because they are in denial about their short comings.
Apparently people with lower self esteem are more likely to experience schadenfreude. I guess that says something about yourself if you feel happy seeing your friends fail. Although I must say we are all bound to feel some form of schadenfreude sometimes in our lives. Like in a game of chess, chess not chest, if your opponent loses, it simply means you win. In situations like that, wouldn't schadenfreude be justified?
Nonetheless, this is probably a very undesired and unhealthy feeling to develop. In some sense our education system in Boleh-land somewhat encourages this . Because everyone's academic scores are always compared to each other, if I perform badly in a class it is always reason for my friends to celebrate, isn't it... Because it means their academic position in class will be better than mine. Schadenfreude anyone?
I digress, back to my friend's house and the drowning of sorrows. Whether it was a form of schadenfreude or their genuine concern for my situation, they started asking me about my love life, which in this case was undeniably, undoubtedly, unmistakably a non-existent entity. And despite it being a night for the friend that just broke up, I started to steal the lime light and ranted for the longest period of time about the situation I was in.
Oh bad bad Lucas... LoL, I went on and on about my failed dates and guy mismatch situation. And some of the other less glorious parts of my life as it is.I think if it was a case of schadenfreude for my friends, it was then a win win situation for everyone. Because I felt better voicing out my problems, and at the same time if they feel better hearing that there are other sad people out in the world, then it's a win win for everyone. Right?
To the friend that just broke up, I like to repeat the cliche of fishes and seas... And to say that it is better to have found out earlier, than later.
To my friends that gave me an outlet to voice my problems and listened to my ranting, I wanna say thank you, because I think it helped heaps.
Kenji in KL 2017
21 hours ago