Wednesday, October 28, 2009

OMG! Thats So Gay!

Recently I did come out to one of my best straight male friend that I am gay. And err, so far almost everything is as it was before I came out, not much has change. Which I guess it’s a good thing, it means me being gay really has nothing to do with our friendship at all… everything is just status quo.

However, one thing that remains status quo that sort of bugs me is that he still uses the term ‘gay’ for something bad. For example he would still say things like, “Omg, that lecturer is so gay… she gave us such a hard assignment for only 10%!” or he would say “I can’t believe they charge so much for a cup of coffee, that’s like soo gay!”

Well before I came out, I guess we did use the term ‘gay’ to describe bad situations very often… and it seems that now even after I have came out, we’re still using that term… or rather he is still using that term. Sigh, I’m not sure if I should feel relieved that me being gay isn’t a big deal at all, so much so that his attitude towards me, including his usage of the word gay, hasn’t changed; or should I take offence that even though he now knows that I am gay, he still uses the term ‘gay’ to describe something bad, which in some sense is derogatory to me… since I’m gay.

Anyhow, I haven’t said anything to him… coz like I said, I am pretty relieved that our friendship is still status quo, even after I have come out to him… which is a good thing… :)

Signing out.

Sunday, October 25, 2009

Oops I Did It Again

It’s the last four weeks of uni, and as I have mentioned before, its when all my assignments and reports are due. Last week I had two reports due on the same day, and it was very stressful. So I did it again… I accidently left my USB stick at the computer lab… AGAIN.

How did that happen? Well you see, my reports were due Thursday, and so from Sunday night till Thursday, I barely could squeeze in more than five hours of sleep a day. By Thursday morning I was operating on Zombie-mode, I actually finished and printed out my reports by five am Thursday morning, then managed to crammed in 3 hours of power sleeping… After that I headed in to uni for my nine am class and also to hand in my assignment. All the while in the lecture, I couldn’t wait to be merdeka (free) of my reports and assignments. After my nine am lecture I had one more class after that, and then I would be free to go home and sleep like the lazy bum that I am.

But… yes, there always is a but. But, while sitting in the lecture, I suddenly realised a mistake in my report, and had to go to the nearest computer lab to correct it. So like a zombie, I went to the closest computer lab I could find, which incidentally happened to be a post graduate lab. Us undergrads aren’t allowed to use those… but screw it, my assignment is of much more importance than some silly undergrad-postgrad rule. So I went in… remember I’m still operating in Zombie-mode, I plugged in my USB stick made the changes to my file, and printed out the error page. I’m not too sure about other uni’s, but at mine, we put money into our student id cards, then slot the cards into printers to have the prepaid funds deducted out when we need to print anything in uni.

Guess what? Low and behold, I did it again! But this time I out did the last time I left stuff in the computer labs. I not only left my USB stick in the computer I was using, but also my student id… T.T

And I didn’t even realise I left them there till that night, when I was shopping for groceries and realised that my student id wasn’t where it was suppose to be (in my wallet’s card compartment). So I was very depressed, coz students lose ids all the time, and they cost a whooping twenty dollars to replace. And up untill then, I didn’t even realise that my USB was not with me. I only realised that it was missing Friday morning, when I was going into uni to search for my id that I left behind.

Anyhow, if there are any Devine beings up above that governs the regulation of lost-and-found, they were really shining brightly on me. Because Friday morning, a whole 24hours later when I returned to the computer lab, my stuff were still there, sitting at the corner of the printer. Side by side, my card and USB stick were there waiting for me to come back and collect them. All I can say is thank you whomever that was kind enough to not take my stuff and left them there for me. Oh well, I should really learn from my mistakes and be less clumsy about leaving stuff behind in uni.

Signing out.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Im Still Relevent

Hey, just thought I'd drop in a post to validate the fact that I'm still relevent and here :P I've been tied down with assignments lately... and its seriously annoying. I had 2 major assignments due last Friday and another 2 due this Thursday. The 2 this Thursday is even more annoying, because they require me to use engineering simulation packages, which are only available in the engineering computer labs... hence I've been camping at the labs till late at night everyday.

The camping is bad... I've been eating irregularly because of the work. Ate at 9.30 Sunday nite and about 10 on monday nite... horrible I know, but I have no choice. I have to complete both assignments by Thursday.

Oh... And did I mention that I freaking hate engineering simulation packages... because they are so freaking unstable and frequently crash ,partly due to shitty computers at certain com labs, which incidently are the only once that are always available... the labs with good comps are always full, as its assignment period for everyone. Apart from the constant crashing, the simulation packages need to be accurately specified, otherwise it wouldn't do what you want it to do. And I thought computer were smart... Bleh if the program annoys me too much... I wont have anymore mercy for it.

On a lighter note, there are a lot of cute engineering guys in the comp labs. Of course they are also camping there to completer their assignments. Hmm... I must say tho, not all students doing engineering are nerdy... some of them are really quite muscly and hot. Of course I'm also pretty into nerdy studious types... so whenever I get too sick of the computer simulation package... I start looking around :P

Signing out.

Friday, October 16, 2009

A Nice Dose of Karma


Melbourne 2009- The residents of The University of Melbourne were shock to have discovered a rare incidence or good karma happening on their campus. This rare occurrence was reported to have taken place in the Baillieu Library on the evening of Thursday the 15th.

A student by the name of Lucas was said to have left his USB-stick at one of the computer labs, and when he returned to claim it almost 2 hours later, the USB-stick was mysteriously still there. This has been labelled as a rare case of good karma because on the very same day, Lucas actually returned a USB-stick he found from the engineering computer lab in the Old Engineering Building to the lost and found office.

It is unclear as to what the actual USB-stick Lucas found was, but it was believed to be a pricey 4-GB Imation Atom USB-stick. It is usually priced at around AUD30.00 and is considered fairly expensive by the tech community. However the USB that Lucas left behind at the computer lab and subsequently reunited with its rightful owner (Lucas) was supposed to have been a cheap regular 4-GB USB-stick.

Library staff at the Baillieu Library acknowledged this as a rare case of good karma as electronic equipment frequently gets lost or stolen in the library. The staff reveals that many valuables get stolen or lost on a weekly basis at the library. When asked why the library doesn’t install more CCTV cameras to curb this loss of precious student belongings, the staff simply respond by saying that having CCTV at every corner of the library is hard to implement without going through a lot of bureaucratic work, as the CCTV violates student privacy rights.

Our reporters have managed to track down Lucas in his busy schedule and asked him a few questions regarding the good karma that was bestowed upon him. Lucas says, “I never really thought I would be able to be reunited with my USB as things frequently get lost in the library.” Lucas says he believes so because last semester he had had friends who have lost their notebook-PC and I-pods in the library. When asked, Lucas says, “I may not always believe in good karma, but I guess this case would make me rethink my beliefs in karma.” Lucas also mentioned that he was very thankful to the forces above that made it possible for him to reunite with his USB-stick.

This maybe a rare sighting of good karma, but maybe the general population of the university would start seeing this as a sign and treat each other better, so that they would have good karma returned to them.

Signing out.

Sunday, October 11, 2009

Noble Peace Out

I was never really convinced about the guy when he was elected as the president in one of the more important nations of the world. I mean I personally always found him to be too much of an actor, its like instead of a world leader… he was more of a celebrity, the way he spoke, the way he talks and the way he acts. I do not doubt that he is an excellent public speaker, certainly heaps better than any of the politicians we find back home. I mean, quite a number of our MPs can barely give a good speech in their own mother tongue, be it Chinese, tamil/hindi or malay, let alone give a public speech in English as eloquently and with such charge as Barrack. But, we aren’t here to criticise our politicians, because I know that they are trying to do their best back home (what??? Its not as if I’m only adding that sentence so that my blog doesn’t get shut down… I’m quite sure I really mean it…)

Well he recently won the Nobel peace prize, congrats Barrack… but hmm, I wonder how peaceful is he really is? I mean, sure he shut down Gvantanamo Bay, but that just means he doesn’t like some ISA established by Georgy-boi right? He could very much have something similar somewhere else in the world that is hidden…

Ok, ok… I know I sound pessimistic and critical of him, but I think he has yet to have done something exceptional. Sure, some of his decisions have helped cure the global economy of its ill health, but in economic cycle terms, after about a year and a half… economies usually do recover from extreme financial crises anyway. So, yea nothing exceptional I suppose.

The one thing he probably did that I would raise my cup to is his stand on gay rights. Well he has always claimed to be a traditional Christian so he cannot in his on religious views stand for gay marriage. But despite that, he has manage to try and please us gays by supporting full civil unions that give same-sex couples legal rights and privileges equal to those of married couples. I guess that’s a pretty good start, if the gay people cant have a legal marriage, at least they can still be legally acknowledged as a couple in civil union. That once again much more than we can ever expect back home. Barrack also mentioned that he has no objection to state governments themselves legalising gay marriages, and this is already the case for 5 states in the US: Massachusetts, Connecticut, Iowa, Vermont and New Hampshire :) Thumbs up to the voting people there that made it possible.

Barrack is also in favour of abolishing the “don’t ask don’t tell” military ruling, whereby gay soldiers are allowed to openly serve as gay soldiers in the military. Currently in the US, if you are enrolled in the military… you’re actually not allowed to ask if anyone else is gay, or tell anyone else that your are gay. And that ruling is in place for the entire time in which you are enlisted in the army. Any breach of that ruling can earn you a dishonourary discharge from the military. Boo!

Well, through all his traditional Christian views, I’m happy to see that Barrack has in some ways been accommodating to gay people in the US. Allowing civil union but not gay marriage is still discriminating in some sense, but at least it’s a start isn’t it? Anyway, I’d just like to say once again congratulation Barrack in winning the Nobel peace prize this year, and may you prove me wrong in my pessimistic views on your policy and ‘celebrity-like’ actions. Please don’t just turn out to be a celebrity president and suddenly feel pressured to start adopting African or Cambodian babies.

Signing out.

Friday, October 9, 2009

Awkward Wall of Silence

I actually went on a date lately… someone from fridae :) and enjoyed myself quite a bit. It was a lunch date, a plain lunch date… not lunch with sex on the side, just plain lunch by itself. Now as I said, I thought the date went pretty well, the liking for each other’s company seemed to be mutual and we had quite a bit in common between us.

But despite having many things in common, the date still came to a point whereby there was the deathly awkward silence and lost for words. I guess its like any normal first date isn’t it? Once you get pass the pleasantries: What do you study? Where do you stay? Where do you like hanging out? … When we’ve exhausted all the usual first date topics, we approach the wall of silence, where there is a period of awkward silence.

If you’re lucky, you would have got pass most of the meal and can then ask for the bill, then part ways after that… or head back to someone’s place to fuck your brains out. If you’re unlucky… then the awkward wall of silence would have hit you only half way through the meal, and you would have to endure sitting through the other half in that awkward silence with building anxiety and uncomfortableness… that sometimes is even enough to ruin sex after the meal… if you were planning for any.

Anyway, thankfully as I said we seem to like each other… at least I think I liked him… or rather found him pleasant. And thank all of the heavens above, because as we were staring at the wall of silence for a while… feeling the silent awkwardness building up, we suddenly found another mutual topic to talk about… we both actually went to Sydney at the same time over the school break :) Well that opened up a whole new list of topics about the places we visited and liked..

Silence maybe be golden, but I sure ain't a freaking gold digger.

All I’m saying is that silence may be golden, but on a date, especially a first date, gold is seriously the last thing on my mind. All I want is for the date to go smoothly… and for me to have a good time. So I’d like to wish good luck to everyone on their first dates, in their conquest of overcoming the awkward wall of silence.

Signing out.

Sunday, October 4, 2009

Murphy I Hate You

It’s a bit silly how you can try as hard as you may to avoid somethings from happening, but in the end it happens anyway… lately my life has gotten a bit more complicated than it should be, because some of my straight friends have started to suspect that I’m gay. These are straight Malaysian friends, more conservative than usual Malaysian friends… so I’m no where near ready to come out to them yet.

Anyway, they have been very nosy lately, and from my knowledge they have even asked my housemate to snoop around and find out if I’m gay. Sigh, I wish they would just leave me alone…

Well something bad happened today that would further raise their suspicion that I’m gay… and I think its all my own fault. See I met up with a gay friend for dinner tonight, and we decided to go to one of the restaurants in Melbourne for dinner. This was a simple Chinese restaurant that had 3 branches in Melbourne. My friend insisted we went to branch A (lets call it), but because I know my friends usually go there to take away or to eat, I insisted that we went to branch B instead. Had a light argument about why we had to walk to the further branch, but he gave in at the end.

Guess what happened? After ordering our food and sitting down… there were my friends, the very same group that were suspicious of me… WTF!!! I tried sooo hard to avoid them, and there they were, in the branch that they never go to. Well, I know they never go to this branch because they hated the waiters at this branch (rude waiters), that’s why I picked to come here. BUT there they were.

Sigh, now they are going to suspect that I’m gay even more because I was having dinner with a cute Caucasian dude that was wearing shorts (only end of winter) and was a bit 'fabulous'. I tried to salvage the situation by saying he’s a uni friend, but I’m really not sure how much of that they bought. FML!

Oh its called ‘Murphy I Hate You’ not because one of my over suspicious friend is called Murphy… rather I’m sorta making a reference to Murphy’s law, where by it states that anything that can go wrong will go wrong.

Signing out.

Saturday, October 3, 2009

Awkward Telly Moments

Its been a long time since I updated, but I was actually a bit tied down due to the fact that my parents visited me over my second week of school break. So basically I had to play tour guide and bring them around the city. They’ve been here a couple of times before, so it wasn’t like we went to any tourist-type of destinations… but I was more a tour guide for bringing them around food and shopping.

They didn’t stay in my apartment when they were around, which was good, because I still get to have my own privacy and own space :) instead, they put up in a hotel a few blocks from my apartment, which was convenient for me to visit.

Anyway, something awkward happened when we were watching telly in their hotel room. There was this program showing called ‘GLEE’, and there was a few scenes with a gay kid and a gay teacher (separate scenes of course) in it… it was freaking awkward and weird when I was watching it with my family. And this isn’t the first time I got that awkward feeling… I got that a lot too when watching ‘Brothers & Sisters’ with my mom. Well as most of you would already know, there is a gay brother in ‘Brothers & Sisters’.

Why issit awkward? Because sometimes I think my mom sorta partially-maybe-possibly suspects that I could be probably gay. So when these scenes come on, I sometimes feel she is scrutinising my actions and reactions to see how I react to the gay scene being shown on the telly screen. And I find that situation very awkward. I wonder if anyone else feels the same awkwardness I do when watching harmless gay scenes that appear on tv with their families.

Signing out.