My other big reason for staying abroad is obviously my sexuality. I do want to live closer to my parents as I am very close to them. But sometimes I find it very hard to live under the same roof with them, particularly with their conservative thoughts.
And being gay is obviously that much harder, if and I say IF, I have a boyfriend… I most certainly can’t bring him home.
Say if I could afford my own place close to my parents’ home, then that would be the most ideal situation, so that I can frequently visit them while still maintaining my own privacy when I need it.
I am certainly in no position to buy my own house yet, and there is no reason for my parents to chip in to buy me a place just so that I can move out.
“why you wanna move out when you can stay at home?” “why waste money to buy a new place when staying at home saves you so much?”
And I’m sure if I mention renting…
“staying at home is so confortable, why waste money and rent just to stay with strangers… FAMILY is always the best”
So all I can really do is to save up and maybe buy my own place in the future. Frankly speaking… the starting wages in Malaysia puts me in no position to even consider buying a house… let alone getting one in the PJ area… in which I understand is very pricey at the moment. Not to mention I must also consider getting the house in a good neighbourhood with a good security guard system… LoL
Hence working overseas with a slightly higher wage, coupled with a strong foreign currency will give me much more options when I decide whether or not to settle back down in Malaysia. And if my parents don't intend to migrate with me, then I'll have to come back (to answer Will's question), as I don't wanna leave my parents alone in their old age.
A lot of people tell me that once I’ve stayed overseas a few years, I won’t want to come back anymore. That is not true, because as a Malaysian I think we are very good at adapting. Even after being abroad for six years, I’m still proud to be a Malaysian, and would gladly move back if not for all these obstacles.
Initially I don’t feel the need to justify to anyone, safe for my parents, my choice to stay overseas and look for a job. But of late, especially during the Chinese New Year period, I am becoming quite unpleasantly annoyed at some of my relative’s and friends’ comments about not coming back to my home country.
“Overseas graduates like you are contributing to our brain drain…” “Why not you come back to work here and contribute to your own economy instead of another country’s?” “Young people like you should be more grateful and remember your roots, you are still a Malaysian and must always remember that.”
Why imagine hearing these comments time and again over the space of only a few weeks back… I’m certain even the most learned monks would at least be slightly roused up. Well I’ve decided to offload some of my steam here… sorry to those of you reading this that disagree… but I think even those that condemn my decision to stay abroad would most definitely jump at a chance to migrate if granted the opportunity.
And to begin with, I am not uprooting myself and moving to another country for good. All I am planning to do now is search for a job overseas to broaden my horizons. I am certainly very open to the option of coming back to Malaysia in the future, if my country wants me, I want him too.
Economic reasons is certainly one of the key factors in me making my decision, but as with all trilogies, I’ll save that for the last. What I’d like to talk about firstly is the general safety of our beloved country.
Having been around for a while in the neighbourhood that I’m in… my house alone has been the victim of theft a total of 4 times… thankfully all four times nobody was home and only earthly possessions were sorely missed. I however fear to even imagine the ghastly consequence of a family member being home when one of those ruthless thieves striked.
Some people may casually dismiss my unfortunate quadrupled theft to simple bad fortune, but let me assure you that this is very much a petrifying and real threat to all of us. In fact the evidence is staring at us right in the face, I have now totally lost count of the number of housing estates and neighbourhoods around the Klang Valley that have been regrettably tasked to set up and hire their own gated security force, just to sleep soundly at night.
The fact that we the citizens are required to hire our own security force is blatant distrust and lack of confidence of the authorities. And that is how we the people of Malaysia have been ‘trained’ to function, when faced with a problem… like bad social security, instead of taking it up with the people in charge… we sit back, take it up the ass, and fork out our own money to hire extra protection.
It isn’t really tackling the problem at the root, but just finding an alternative ‘temporary’ solution. But I suppose to be fair, there are a group of Malaysians that have worked hard to weed out the evil in the system, but to no avail… it seems that even now, they have only succeeded in proving that nothing can be done.
For its citizens to live a productive life and contribute to the general economic wellbeing of the country, they must firstly feel safe in whatever environment they are in. When our general safety and wellbeing is consistently and frequently challenged, its hard then to live a productive life when you always have to look over your back.
Having to hire and establish our own security and gated community is in my opinion a mild form of vigilante-ism. And vigilantes are usually only required when your city is in the slums and the authorities cannot be counted upon, whether due to a lack of hands or a lack of motivation. Corrupted cities like Gotham requires Batman and Metropolis need Superman. Having to establish our own security system is a little like that… it is a form of vigilantes.
My mom always chides me when I come home late after a late night out, and I understand that she fears for my safety when going out late. What with all the internet and sms circulating around about stories of people getting robbed and harassed at night, her fear for my safety is not unfounded. In fact, sometimes even I feel a little scared when staying out too late, but hey… I do like the occasional night out with my friends…
So I start of a series of posts on my reason of staying abroad with safety… some of you may disagree with what I have to say, but… frankly speaking, this is how I feel. And when the time is right, if I am able to convince my parents to do so, I also hope they may choose to live in a safer environment. And of course, I sincerely hope that the safe environement will be back home here in Malaysia. But a lot of work needs to be done before we can achieve that.
Hmm, I had a sudden epiphany as my index finger was slammed shut into the door of my car today. Maybe I shouldn’t worry so much about others and start to think of myself more.
What happened was that after an early morning gym session as I was leaving the car park, another car signalled that she wanted my place. So in I hopped to my car and tried to exit the parking spot as quickly as possible so as to not hold up the traffic waiting behind her.
Me being me, I’m usually quite a clumsy person, so in my rush to exit quickly, I kinda slammed the tip of my index finger in the car door. OUCH! Seriously OUCH! Luckily it was only the tip… hence there wasn’t much damage to the finger. Much…
On my drive home, I started to wonder, why the fuck should I care about exiting the parking spot quickly in the first place? She wanted the spot, so she should be patient and wait for it. And screw all the other cars waiting behind her… But then I think of all the times I wait forever behind a car coming out of a parking spot because he/she takes their own sweet time while holding up the traffic and is wasting everyone else’s time. And I seriously don’t want to be one of those mother fuckers that waste others’ time…
Sigh… is it true that I sometimes put the priorities of others ahead of my own priorities? I don’t know the answer to that… but what I do know is that after slamming my finger in today… I’m going to start to be more careful, and not hurt myself in the process just to please others.
I guess getting my finger squashed is also partly my own clumsy fault… but seriously, in my defence, I would have certainly have been more careful and less clumsy if I wasn’t in a hurry.
This reminds me of the bridge in Sara Bareilles’ song ‘King of Anything’. The bridge goes something like:
All my life I’ve tried to make everybody happy While I just hurt and hide Waiting for someone to tell me it’s my turn to decide
Its a very nice song, with a catchy tune. You guys and gals should check it out :)
I'm currently back in my home town to celebrate the new year with my family and friends, and over the weekend decided to hit the usual watering hole in the heart of kl city - MP. Went with a few gay friends, and despite it being a Chinese new year weekend, there were still quite a number of guys there.
The one thing that really caught my eye in MP was the valentine day poster! Omg, it was a picture of Goku and Vegeta together... one of the two main characters of the classic manga, Dragon Ball!
When I was a kid, not too long ago I assure you, I use to read Dragon Ball all the time. In fact I have literally the whole collection of the manga in the malay language version. And... I have always fantasized about those two characters getting it on! and Woah!
Here's MP's Valentine Day's flyer!
Haha... This is one of those celeb couples like one of my previous post that I secretly (now not soo much a secret anymore) hoped for. Check out the poster, and if you're a Dragon Ball fan, I'm sure it'll turn you on :p Goku and Vegeta together is almost as awesome as Naruto and Sasuke together. Wahahaha!
Here's Goku with his Saiyan alter ego Kakaroct... kind of a CNY tribute to my eyes :P
I’ve been thinking a lot about aphrodisiacs, and one of the more well-known one is the oyster. So oysters are supposed to make a person feel more hyped up about sex, and want it more. Well that is what an aphrodisiac is right? To in some sense make a person sort of horny.
So this certainly made me think, have I ever felt hornier after consuming oyster products? A lot of Chinese cooking uses oysters as an ingredient. Dishes such as the oyster omelette, a.k.a. “Ohh Zhien”, Dumplings, a.k.a. “Zhang” and also seafood noodles, do add oysters in. Also oyster sauce, is a very common marinade and flavouring in Chinese food is found in heaps of other Chinese dishes. So I can’t help but ask myself if I felt any more, hornier after eating them.
The answer is most certainly: not really. So then I start to think… why is oyster considered an aphrodisiac, is there a particular chemical compound within the sea crustacean that heightens our sex drive? And if there really is such a chemical compound within the oyster, why hasn’t a major pharmaceutical tried to extract it and market it as a substitute to Viagra, a multi-billion dollar industry…
Did some light reading on the net and found that some people reckon oysters increases one’s horny-ness because it supposedly smells like pussy. Yes you heard me right, pussy. I sure hope this piece of information doesn’t deter any of you from oysters, coz even as I type this out now, I still luv oysters… Although I seriously doubt they do smell like an actual cunt.
Anyway, if this whole pussy and oyster thing has any truth to it, does that mean that oysters only work as an aphrodisiac on straight guys and dykes? Does it not work on gay guys whom prefer ass and cock? LoL! A little something to ponder on guys, next time you want to order those expensive air flown oyster entrees to try to get into a guy’s pants, think twice… the oysters may have no effect on him at all.
To all the Chinese out there, Happy Chinese new year to you! And remember to eat more dried oysters, as the Cantonese pronunciation of dried oysters means “good things”, hence it will be at the very least auspicious to consume them oysters, even if they don’t make you any hornier.